Happy Mommy, Happy Kids
Maneuvering emotions aren’t a cakewalk, even when it comes to adults, and once in a while , they do need sane advice as to how to stabilize their emotional flare-ups.
There can be moments of outright rage for parents, especially mothers who generally take a major role in handling the household, and of the children. Nevertheless, we can’t let the temperament slip and it’s crucial to take control right away.
First things first, we need to know our provocations and we’ll win half the battle. There can be times when you are just handling the extensive part of parenthood and asking for your partner’s help seems a little hard, and as result, you keep piling up the negativity within. In this case, you need to talk it out with your husband and explain how burdensome it is for you and request him to share the load or manage house help to do the same.
We often fail to remember that a ‘happy me’ will keep a ‘happy we’. You are an individual first and then a mother. Having our own time appears to be non-existent. That is the biggest blunder we can do to our mental health, eventually outpouring it on our kids and family. Having a little time out, some breathing space, meditation, exercising or just a half-hour stroll won’t turn the world around for your family.
Sometimes, other than external triggers, there might be problems within. We might set our expectations way beyond league. In such cases, disappointment is definite but what’s worse our rejoinder.
The moment we feel things aren’t ensuing the way we expected, it all comes out as a bolt out of the blue. Rather we must ask ourselves, ‘ did we keep our expectations realistic?’, or ‘can we achieve those goals we are aspiring with our child?’ and if the answer is doubtful, we should stop right there. It’s a clear indication that it’s time to introspect.
Let’s say, Angie expects her two boys, Samir and Shaleen, who have just turned teenagers, to become responsible, manage their time well and be disciplined about their routine. Now, this might seem like no rocket science but let’s see the flip side. They have always been spoon-fed in their house and these expectations suddenly take a backtrack once they turn teenagers.
We, as parents, should try and imbibe these expected behavioral patterns right from the very beginning. Just an occasion doesn’t really bring sudden changes in children’s lives and nor does lectures and nagging. What does is consistency.
Apart from this, once in a while prioritizing yourself, getting a nice spa, a hot bath or a friend’s day out won’t harm anybody, rather when you’ll be happy, you’ll pass on the happy vibe all around the house!
All said and done, there will be times when all goes out of hand and you can’t control your anger, so in those times, try and have a look at your child for a few minutes and think of how your reaction is going to be transmitted. That will surely put an end to your inner crook.