Traditional v/s Modern Parenting

Different parenting styles and mindsets have become more common among young parents in recent years. This change is likely due to evolving needs and environments. For example, our kids are now exposed to more screen time and internet influences and leading a more sedentary lifestyle than ever before. The biggest debate in almost every Indian household today between millennial parents and baby boomer parents is over the evolving methods of parenting.

What is Traditional Parenting?

Traditional parenting is based on an authoritarian parenting style that has been passed down through generations. It is characterized by a focus on raising children to become responsible and productive members of society who can positively contribute to their families.

Parents who adhere to traditional parenting philosophies are both affectionate and loving towards their children while also maintaining a sense of power over them to encourage obedience and responsibility. Though they may be harsh in their disciplinary methods, they nonetheless always have the child’s best interests at heart.

Traditional parenting generally focuses on teaching their children good manners and providing them with a good education. They often believe that education is primarily about academic accomplishments and good grades. While the child generally has little say in the matter, this can be an excellent way to develop responsibility and work ethic.

Drawbacks of Traditional Parenting

Traditional parents typically have more restrictions and boundaries in place. They may find it fit to intervene if they believe that their child is not behaving according to the family’s set ideologies and beliefs. Conventional parenting techniques may be viewed as rigid and inflexible by some. Typically, rules and boundaries are set early on by parents and adhered to closely.

One of the downsides to this mode of parenting is that children may be less likely to develop a strong sense of self or may have difficulty developing proper social skills. This is because they may not have had as much opportunity to explore and create their own character.

What is Modern Parenting?

Modern parenting is a more hands-on, accommodating, and generally harmonious approach to raising children. Modern parents believe that every child is special and requires a different parenting approach. Modern parenting is customized to each child’s individual needs and interests. Much more attention is given to the child’s well-being and mental health. Modern parenting tries to raise their child to be self-reliant with high self-esteem. Modern parents focus on nurturing the child’s talents and personal views while enforcing rules healthily.

Parents who follow traditional methods often create offspring who are scared of them, but modern parents attempt to steer clear of this. They establish themselves as authority figures without having all the control. They emphasize supporting the child’s journey to discovering and strengthening their sense of self. Doing this allows the child to feel secure in their own abilities, something that will be beneficial when they encounter the outside world.

Most modern parents are more concerned with their children developing skills and talents that will be practical in the real world, rather than simply getting good grades. They try to focus on their child’s strengths and help them to build confidence in those areas.

Plus, when modern parents attempt to take on the role of parenting it often leads to a more permissive parenting style, where parents try to let their kids earn privileges instead of taking them away. For instance, parents reward children for giving time to studies rather than punishing them for not studying.

Drawbacks of Modern Parenting

A downside of this parenting style may result in children who are spoiled and unable to deal with frustration or disappointment. This can lead to tantrums and other behavioral problems. As a result, parents can end up feeling like they are powerless and controlled by their children.

There is no denying that the traditional methods our parents used to nurture us were great, but as lifestyles change and technology improves, our lives are affected as well. We cannot raise the new generation of children using only the traditional methods. Rather, it’s important to equally balance traditional ways with modern parenting methods.

Traditional Parenting x Modern Parenting

As parents, it is important that we are able to adjust our parenting approach as our children grow and change. By taking the time to understand what our children need from us at different stages in their lives, we can provide them with the best possible care.

Mixing and matching the positive points from both these methods of parenting is how we can achieve one of the best parenting methods. Here are some ways you can implement the same:

Rewards & Appreciation
One of the things modern parenting got right is this. Reward or appreciate your child for doing something rather than scolding or punishing them for not doing it. If they ate all the veggies on their plate, tell them they’re growing up. However, don’t call them picky if they refuse to eat something on the plate.
Age-Appropriate Chores
Give them the responsibility of a few things around the house, such as keeping their study desk neat and clean or organizing their toys in their respective places. You can also appreciate or thank them for doing what they were already supposed to do so they learn to do the same in the future.
Value Their Opinions
It’s important to listen to children and consider their opinions. This makes them feel valued and builds their confidence to speak up in future situations. If we discourage them from speaking their mind, it can have a negative impact and they will be less likely to express themselves publicly in the future.

There is no one right way to parent, as every child is different and has their own unique needs and wants. You have to figure out what works best for your child and go with that. There is no magic formula or rule book when it comes to parenting.

At Kosh, we help parents determine the best ways to bring up their kids, based on many different factors. Through parenting classes, coaching sessions, and workshops, we help them bring up a happier future generation.